I’m not putting my steps down this week; it’s depressing to me. There were a few days I think I got into the 5K range, but there were also a couple that I barely made it out of triple digits. Maybe by next week I’ll feel like heading back to the gym again, though I’m not even sure about that. There’s the physical part, of course, which will hopefully be resolved by the plethora of medications the doctors have given my for my back. And then there’s the mental/emotional part, which feels like it’s getting stronger every day but then is also surprised every day and I don’t know where to start. Just this evening, sitting in the exam room, it hit me that it had been two weeks—almost to the hour—since the last time I talked to my grandma, the night before she died. I don’t know that there has ever been a two week span of time when I didn’t talk to my grandma, and it made me sad to think of all the times I would get annoyed when she would call about just some pointless little something. Anyway, fortunately I was in the room alone waiting for the doctor since I wouldn’t have wanted to explain the tears suddenly running down my face.
Anyway, I’m continuing to take the Skinny Fiber supplement, though I didn’t lose any weight this week. I forgot to take my measurements, so I don’t know about that, though there was one pair of pants that felt a little looser than before, so maybe when I break out the measuring tape next week I’ll be pleasantly surprised.
Really, it all seems sort of pointless, but I’m staying the course,