It’s not exactly that I want to keep talking about my granny, because honestly, I sort of don’t. I’d rather be talking about something else, but my brain won’t really focus on anything else. Every time I open homework assignments, or bills, or even blog posts, my mind goes right back to Granny. It makes me feel sort of fixated and obsessed.
But I think it’s maybe because we haven’t had the services yet, and it just feels like there’s so much to do, even though there really isn’t. (Well, of course there’s still a lot to do, but not in the immediate sense.) That’s probably part of the “closure” everyone talks about that a farewell service can bring, and only then will my mind settle down and release some of its fixation so that I can put some focus on other things. Unfortunately, I’ve got some homework due before then, so I hope I can find another way to let go just a little bit, or that could be a problem. And in the meantime, I might keep talking about my granny a lot.